A Library of Feelings

Think of the last intense feeling you experienced. Did it feel good or not? Now imagine that feeling as a tangible thing you can hold. Your feeling does not define you. Instead, it is something you are holding onto. Think about the difference between something you hold and something inside you. Your lunch is inside you. It is there no matter the consequences of the extra greasy burger. But if you are holding a greasy burger, you have more options. You can make a decision. 

Recognizing a feeling is something you hold, imagine it as a book, leaflet, or page. Something you'd read, process, and move on from. Feelings of all sorts are meant to express a message. They tell you something to help you navigate through your world. But it can be hard to understand what a feeling is trying to say. 

Think about what you do with written materials in your life. You glance at a receipt and throw it in the trash. You read a letter and save it. You appreciate a greeting card, maybe keep it for a while, and then move it on. Books might take longer. You'll read a book and then put it on the shelf, give it to a friend, or get rid of it. 

Imagine if feelings could apply to all of these situations. Imagine if you could process feelings the way you process paper in your life. Imagine that a greeting card is happiness. You open it and put it on the fridge to enjoy every day for weeks. You hold on to that feeling.  

Maybe your frustration is a receipt. You glance at it and throw it away just like you move on from a frustrating car ride. 

However, sometimes our feelings are more complex. Like a thick magazine or book, they take longer to process. But you still have choices. When you pick up a magazine you can put it aside and not read it. So, too, you can put aside a feeling and decide it is not for you. Instead, maybe you pick up a different book or magazine to read and hold onto. You set down your anger, and pick up forgiveness. You put down frustration, to select patience. 

Sometimes a feeling can't be replaced. We need to sit with those feelings. We sit with a book of grief, pain, or anger. We process the book like we process our feelings, but there is an ending. When the book is done, you get to decide what to do with it. Does it get set on the shelf to remember for later, or left on a park bench for someone else to find? You can hold that book forever, but it is a choice you can make. 

When you can process those feelings as something you hold, they cease to define you. Control and perspective increase as you process what you've got in front of you. 

Not all books are feelings we want to avoid. Some books are happiness, joy, excitement, and pleasure. We can decide on what to do with those as well. When they come along, we can hold them for a very long time. We can keep them to reference for later. We can pass them to a friend, or even buy a friend a copy. When you imagine those feelings as a book, you can better appreciate the feeling. You'll recognize such moment it isn't something that you can hold your attention on forever. Instead, you can enjoy the feeling you are holding right now. 

Often we are not holding only one book or page at a time. We hold novels, magazines, cards, receipts, and all other sorts of pages in a big pile in our arms. We sift through each one processing and deciding where it will go, but they are all there. Similarly, you can have many feelings at once. They are all there, waiting to be recognized and they can affect the way you see other feelings as well. That is okay. Your arms will be less full again. You will be able to focus on the book of happiness so much so that when a receipt of frustration pops up, you send it on it's way. 

I wish for you peace most of all. Peace to process whatever comes your way and perseverance to keep processing. Make your choices. Hold on to the feelings that are important and let the others go. What feeling(s) are you holding onto today?  What will you do with them?